Myself
by EDEN
My eyes go back and front again
I can’t breath
I can’t walk
I’m shaking
Breathing
Waiting
For a release
My heart pounds
My mind screams before it scatters into pieces
My thoughts
Boiling, almost boiling out of the pot
Boiling the lid throwing water, spilling, over-flowing
Tears flowing members repairing
Over and over
Sparks, jolt and twitch
My body moving trying to break away
Trying to tell the truth
Making squirm losing my grip on
Reality, running changing my body
Screaming literally
Looking for help
Help me: cry out
Help me
My cries fall on deaf ears
My cry out shuts
I can’t breath
I can’t speak
I can’t cry for help
My vision goes black
The last thing I see
Is what’s choking me
Myself
Making myself not letting out
The truth
Hating me for it, making everything black
Choking on my pride, my sadness, my fear
Making me
Forcing me to be happy
Everything is okay, it’s alright
Trying to put pieces of my heart
Repacking them, sewing the pieces back
Together weaving hearts
To what people are looking for.
Smashing it
Crushing it
Delousing it
Yet I still have my hands out for them
To hug them, to love them, ready for them
To realize I’m here for you. No need to fight
No need to hurt, no need to lie. I am here for you.